alec harwood coaching

I’m a transformative coach in training, I wouldn’t class myself as a writer but I’m going to punch out some thoughts on my keyboard that may spark some thoughts in you. How does this sound for a first blog post attempt…

When starting a blog post you need to have an idea in your head, and a willingness to get it out there. A beginning, a middle and an end. By the end it could feel like something interesting to think on, to share, through agreement or disagreement you may have stumbled on a new track of thinking (this is just my loose definition, I’ll look up how to write a proper blog at some point I’m sure…)

I’ve been thinking it’s amazing how unique we all are yet how similar we are to those who have come before us and those who will be here long after we are worm food.

The Greeks knew something

I came across a word the Greeks used thousands of years ago, the Greek word akrasia (ἀκρασία). It translates to “lack of self-control” or “weakness of will.”

It is the state of acting against your better judgment, knowingly doing something even though you know a different course of action is probably better.

Here’s what I think the real meat of this is. It’s not about completely closing the gap between who we want to be and what we actually do, it’s about noticing when we’re in this little crossroad moment of akrasia. That’s the whole game, really: catching the moment of choice before it’s already made, easier said than done.

Akrasia, the Greeks have not just nailed a delicious high protein yogurt, they even have a word for the moment I scroll when the dishwasher needs emptying, or when I plough through a bag of chocolate minstrels when an apple is sat staring at me from the fruit bowl.

An old problem

This seems to slot quite nicely into a few conversations I’ve had recently (yes, some of those conversations are with myself), but jokes aside, this problem feels as old as time. Are we a race of people who, given the choice, don’t do the thing until we know we have to? Is the comfort in knowing what we can “get away with” easier than the discomfort of actually doing the doing? I don’t think I want David Goggins shouting at me each day to get out and run, go to the gym, or ‘carry the boats’ but I do think I could do with the pep talk every now and then.

The Vote

Seems as though we are talking about David, I do remember one nugget I took from reading his book (ok, it was an audiobook). I can’t remember the full bit, but it followed loosely: “What would the man do?” Now take the words as you like, the gender is not too important and I’m not sure who this man is. The way I took it has stuck with me. Less of what the man would do, more of what I’d want to do and who I want to be. This helps in some situations, some of the time. It’s not foolproof at all. When it does work, it kicks Akrasia’s ass. Would the man pick up a bit of litter? Yeah, he would. Would the man hold the door for someone? Yup. Would he let a car pull out in front of him? Probably, on a good day. But here’s where it gets tricky. Would the man look after himself by doing the things he knows he should… ahhh, the sticky bit. Sometimes yes, sometimes no. So how do we get to a point where we count up the votes and have more yeah man than nah man?

We just give it a go, don’t we?

We show a bit of compassion and we try. Some days we get it, some days we don’t, but the main thing is we balance the checks and count the votes. Are we being the “insert title that fits you here” we want to be? If not, can you cast a few more yes/yeah votes?

Akrasia has been part of life for 2000+ years. It’s not going away, and neither is that gap. But here’s what I’m trying this week. One vote a day. Not a full life overhaul, just one small “what would I do” moment I actually follow through on. The bed gets made. The dishwasher gets emptied. One yeah man.

If you fancy it, pick your own one vote and see how the week goes. I’ll let you know how mine did